I still hear your voice, remember your laugh, see your smile, and feel the goodness in your heart come through in mine. It seems like you just went away for a while and that you’ll be back. My eyes well up to the brink of tears when I realize you won’t.
I look at old photos. I miss you. I find birthday cards written from you to me. I miss you. Your favorite songs come on the radio. I miss you. I eat at one of your favorite restaurants. I miss you. I play back memories in my mind. I miss you. I breathe. I miss you. I laugh. I miss you. I cry. I miss you. I think of all the things that could have been – things I didn’t even get a chance to miss.
Maybe you never said goodbye because we never have to. Because we’ll always be with each other in spirit. Because I will forever carry you in my heart.
It’s April 7th. Happy birthday, Dad. I miss you every day. Sometimes every minute.
Love, Kid
My dad with my brother and the cake I made on his birthday last year (2010)
Happy Birthday to your dad!
Birthdays are hard after they’re gone. I think they are easier than anniversaries of they day they died.
What has helped us on our mom’s birthday, is to do exactly what she would do: get together for dinner and cake and then go to the Casino. The birthdays have gotten easier. Take it easy on yourself. It’s tough.
Thanks for reading and sharing, Sara! It was hard not buying a birthday present, not making that morning phone call to say happy birthday, not picking up a cake or cupcakes to bring over after work.
I love that you still get together for dinner and cake! I took my brother to a malt shop that our dad used to take us to. Although it was nice, it felt strange to be there without him on his birthday. I hope you’re right and it gets easier.
Thanks again for commenting. It helps more than you might know when people reach out and share their thoughts :)
Happy belated birthday to your dad! I found your blog this morning and your writing has really touched me. My father passed away May 3, 2010 and I miss him tremendously, every single day.
I wish you peace, even for just a moment.
Thanks, Ellen :). I’m so sorry to hear you also lost your dad recently. I find the sadness hits me when I least expect it. Actually, my birthday is this week and I’m taking a trip and typically my dad would be the first person I’d share good news with. I found myself tearing up when I realized I couldn’t tell him about it.
I hope that wonderful memories and feelings of appreciation for the time you were fortunate enough to have with him fill your heart when it’s feeling empty. Take care :)